It's a new year

I just viewed my last entry and I have to say that it's been a while since I posted.

November and December were really tough. The closer I got to Christmas, the edgier I got - mostly because Christmas is no longer just Christmas. Christmas is now also the time when Chris died. All I knew is that I wanted to power through those months and just get my work done, get through the one-year mark, and get to my vacation. My energy was being stretched and so I told myself that I would concentrate on really keeping care of my mental health during that time and not worry so much about the physical. I didn't track what I was eating, I didn't pay attention to my water usage, I ate whatever I want and whenever I wanted, and I didn't really sleep well. My goal for the holidays - to start the year still under the 300 mark.

And I'm happy to say that I made it. JUST BARELY. The last time I weighed in December I was at 298.6. Yesterday I was at 298.4. So I maintained and below the 300 mark. I achieved my goal.

Of course this is about 12 pounds more than I was at my lowest. And I notice the differences. I don't breathe as easily, my newest clothes feel tighter, and I just feel kinda dumpy. But I am still 12 pounds less than I was at the beginning of last year. Of course then I can look at my friends like Susan who has kicked ass and managed to lose a lot more than 12 and I realize that I can totally do better than what I did.

So I am starting off again this year. I am dedicating myself to tracking what I eat and how I feel before eating. And to move more. (Yeah yeah - I know I'm basically reciting the WW program - what can I say - I'm totally drunk on their low-fat kool-ade)

Oh and I will blog more.